tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21239377234408955932012-02-15T23:40:39.908-08:00O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.comBlogger3611100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-34855189899343622222010-06-01T07:16:00.000-07:002010-06-01T07:17:11.903-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT:<br />“And what starting salary were you looking for?”</span></p><div> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;"><span style="font-size:100%;">The Engineer replies, “In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.”</span></p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;"><span style="font-size:100%;">The interviewer enquires, “Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years say, a red Corvette?”</span></p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;"><span style="font-size:100%;">The Engineer sits up straight and says:<br />“Wow! Are you kidding?”</span></p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;"><span style="font-size:100%;">And the interviewer replies:<br />“Yeah, but you started it.”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3485518989934362222?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-24613529792604781302010-06-01T07:12:00.000-07:002010-06-01T07:13:12.304-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;"><span style="font-size:100%;">A little boy was doing his homework one evening and turned to his father and said,<br />“Dad, where would I find the Andes?</span></p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;"><span style="font-size:100%;">“Don’t ask me,” said the father. “<br />Ask your mother. She puts everything away in this house.”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2461352979260478130?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-48765927181651278812010-06-01T06:42:00.000-07:002010-06-01T06:46:11.279-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God. He thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read:</p><div> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">Dear God,</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension check. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me?</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">Sincerely,</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">Edna</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman. The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter came from the old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read:</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">Dear God,</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 153); text-align: left;">How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift. By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it must have been those thieving bastards at the Post Office.</p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4876592718165127881?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-46704605033832534712010-04-06T09:57:00.002-07:002010-04-06T09:58:16.440-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse named Buddy.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">He hitched Buddy up to the car and yelled, “Pull, Nellie, pull!” Buddy didn’t move.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Then the farmer hollered, “Pull, Buster, pull!” Buddy didn’t respond.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Once more the farmer commanded, “Pull, Coco, pull!” Nothing.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Then the farmer nonchalantly said, “Pull, Buddy, pull!” And the horse easily dragged the car out of the ditch.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The motorist was most appreciative and very curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The farmer said, “Oh, Buddy is blind and if he thought he was the only one pulling, he wouldn’t even try!”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4670460503383253471?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-34045453568018640752010-04-06T09:57:00.001-07:002010-04-06T09:57:29.720-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">A lady walks into the drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some arsenic.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">“Ma’am, what do you want with arsenic?” “To kill my husband.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">“I can’t sell you arsenic to kill a person!”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The lady lays down a photo of a man and a woman in a compromising position.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The man is her husband and the woman is the pharmacist’s wife.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">He takes the photo, and nods. “I didn’t realize you had a prescription!”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3404545356801864075?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-77943861264254266002010-04-06T09:56:00.001-07:002010-04-06T09:56:57.284-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">A man sat down and was seriously staring at the marriage certificate.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">After a long time his wife asked, “What are you looking for?</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">He replied, “The expiration date.”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7794386126425426600?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-63726236780175909092010-04-06T09:55:00.000-07:002010-04-06T09:56:11.180-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">A couple, desperate to conceive a child, went to their priest and asked him to pray for them.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">“I’m going on a sabbatical to Rome,” he replied, “and while I’m there, I’ll light a candle for you.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">When the priest returned three years later, he went to the couple’s house and found the wife pregnant, busily attending to two sets of twins.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Elated, the priest asked her where her husband was so that he could congratulate him.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">“He’s gone to Rome, to blow that candle out” came the harried reply.</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6372623678017590909?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-12788148177642286212010-04-06T09:54:00.003-07:002010-04-06T09:55:33.236-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The nurse comes up to the first man and says, “Congratulations, you got twins.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The man said “How strange, I’m the manager of Minnesota Twins.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">After awhile the nurse comes up to the second man and says, “Congratulations, you got triplets.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Man was like “Hmmm, strange I worked as a director for the “3 musketeers.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Finally, the nurse comes up to the third man and says<br />“Congratulations, you got twins x2.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Man is happy and says, “Ironic, I work for the hotel “4 Seasons.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">All three of them are happy until they see their last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his head on the wall.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">They asked him what’s wrong and he answered, “What’s wrong?</span></p> <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I work for 7up”</span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1278814817764228621?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-72003280543109129882010-04-06T09:54:00.002-07:002010-04-06T09:55:31.775-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The nurse comes up to the first man and says, “Congratulations, you got twins.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The man said “How strange, I’m the manager of Minnesota Twins.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">After awhile the nurse comes up to the second man and says, “Congratulations, you got triplets.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Man was like “Hmmm, strange I worked as a director for the “3 musketeers.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Finally, the nurse comes up to the third man and says<br />“Congratulations, you got twins x2.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Man is happy and says, “Ironic, I work for the hotel “4 Seasons.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">All three of them are happy until they see their last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his head on the wall.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">They asked him what’s wrong and he answered, “What’s wrong?</span></p> <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I work for 7up”</span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7200328054310912988?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-23045440456906362262010-04-06T09:54:00.001-07:002010-04-06T09:54:45.645-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">At an optometrist’s office, “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">On a taxidermist’s window, “We really know our stuff.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">On a butcher’s window, “Let me meat your needs.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">On a fence, “Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">At a car dealership, “The best way to get back on your feet — miss a car payment.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Outside a muffler shop, “No appointment necessary. We’ll hear you coming.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">On a desk in a reception room, “We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">In a veterinarian’s waiting room, “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2304544045690636226?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-52746448057597202482010-04-06T09:53:00.002-07:002010-04-06T09:54:14.151-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a “handy-woman” and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">“Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,” he said. How much will you charge me?” The blonde quickly responded, “How about $50?”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The man’s wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, “Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?” He responded, “That’s a bit cynical, isn’t it? The wife replied, “You’re right. I guess I’m starting to believe all those dumb blonde jokes we’ve been getting by e-mail lately.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. “You’re finished already?” the husband asked. “Yes,” the blonde replied, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.” Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">“And by the way,” the blonde added, “it’s not a Porsche, it’s a Lexus.”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-5274644805759720248?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-16850141360937934072010-04-06T09:53:00.001-07:002010-04-06T09:53:32.710-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">One winter morning a husband and wife in Denver were listening to the radio during breakfast.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">They heard the announcer say, “We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">So the good wife went out and moved her car.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, “We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The good wife went out and moved her car again.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, “We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park….” Then the electric power went out. The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, “Honey, I don’t know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to blondes exhibit, the husband replied, “Why don’t you just leave it in the garage this time?”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1685014136093793407?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-12939340452869633332010-04-06T09:52:00.001-07:002010-04-06T09:52:59.060-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">A tightwad was looking for a gift to give a friend. Everything was too expensive except for a glass vase that had been broken and he could purchase it for almost nothing.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">He asked the store to send it hoping his friend would think it had been broken in transit.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">In due time he received a note: “thanks for the vase,” it read. “It was so thoughtful of you to wrap each piece separately.”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1293934045286963333?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-16108077860627354102010-04-06T09:51:00.000-07:002010-04-06T09:52:04.876-07:00<p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Earl and Bob, both obsessed with baseball, never missed their favorite team’s game.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">They promised, whoever died first, and went to heaven, would come back to earth and tell the other if there was baseball in heaven.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">One day, Earl died. Bob waited for him to come back. Finally Earl did. He said to Bob. “I have good news and bad news.</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">I’ll tell you the good news first. There is baseball in heaven.”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Bob said, “That’s the best news!”</span></p> <p style="font-family: trebuchet ms; color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="font-size:100%;">Then Earl said, time for the bad news….”You’re pitching tomorrow night.”</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1610807786062735410?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-24811624231932505412010-02-18T04:57:00.002-08:002010-02-18T04:59:58.126-08:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night. You pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for the bus:</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.<br />2. An old friend who once saved your life.<br />3. The perfect man (or) woman you have been dreaming about.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Think before you continue reading. This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first; or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect dream lover again.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer.<br />He simply answered: “I would give the car keys to my old friend, and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the woman of my dreams.”<br />Never forget to “Think Outside of the Box.”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2481162423193250541?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-26622045002731014132010-02-18T04:57:00.001-08:002010-02-18T05:00:42.132-08:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Q. How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">A. They can’t do it, it’s a hardware problem.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2662204500273101413?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-46512536209401825462010-02-18T04:56:00.001-08:002010-02-18T05:01:01.097-08:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">A teacher asked little Johnny if he knows his 1 to 10 well.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“Yes! Of course! My pop taught me…even more than 10!”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“Good. What comes after three?”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“Four,” answers the boy.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“What comes after six?”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“Seven.”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“Very good,” says the teacher. “Your erm…dad did a good job. Now…so what comes after…lets say ten?”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“A jack!”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4651253620940182546?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-87648886342641530592010-02-18T04:53:00.000-08:002010-02-18T05:02:05.167-08:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">A man was walking on the beach one day and he found a bottle half buried in the sand. He decided to open it.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Inside was a genie. The genie said,<br />” I will grant you three wishes and three wishes only.”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The man thought about his first wish and decided,<br />“I think I want 1 million dollars transferred to a Swiss bank account. POOF!</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Next he wished for a Ferrari red in color. POOF! There was the car sitting in front of him.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">He asked for his final wish, ” I wish I was irresistible to women.” POOF! He turned into a box of chocolates.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-8764888634264153059?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-87749306802024936612009-10-14T04:46:00.003-07:002009-10-14T04:46:54.186-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">My boss came in one morning and caught me hugging my secretary.<br />He said in a rage, “Is this what you get paid for ?”<br />I told him, “Nope ! I do this for free.”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-8774930680202493661?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-21885313242188605422009-10-14T04:46:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:46:19.568-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit;<br /><br />Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2188531324218860542?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-75949476166929260412009-10-14T04:45:00.003-07:002009-10-14T04:45:53.632-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Cop on horse says to little girl on bike, “Did Santa get you that?”<br />“Yes,” replies the little girl.<br /><br />“Well tell him to put a reflector light on it next year!” and fines her $5.<br /><br />The little girl looks up at the cop and says,<br />“Nice horse you’ve got there, did Santa bring you that?”<br /><br />The cop chuckles and replies, “He sure did!”<br /><br />“Well,” says the little girl,<br />“Next year tell Santa that the d*ck goes under the horse, not on top of it!”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7594947616692926041?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-4365381619685655162009-10-14T04:45:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:45:24.566-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?<br /><br />Professional courtesy. Hmm…</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-436538161968565516?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-59978773831666849212009-10-14T04:44:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:45:01.187-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A Horse goes into a bar and the bartender says<br /><br />“Hey buddy, Why the Long Face”?</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-5997877383166684921?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-21493858648766146182009-10-14T04:44:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:44:31.438-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A group of people were in a shipwreck and were stranded on an island.<br /><br />The group consisted of 12 women and 1 man. After a few months, the women grew horny and it was decided that the man needed to take two women a day and they allowed him to have Sundays off.<br /><br />One day on a day off, he was just relaxing when he noticed a boat nearing. He felt hopeful that maybe they would be rescued, at last.<br /><br />The boat was almost to the island when the guy noticed it was a man in the boat. As he got out the first guy said “Oh my God buddy, am I ever glad to see YOU, To which the second guy responded “Well alright sweetie! It’s been a long time for me too.”<br /><br />The first man exclaimed “Oh hell, there go my Sundays!”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2149385864876614618?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-35569151050315551542009-10-14T04:43:00.003-07:002009-10-14T04:43:55.368-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?”<br /><br />The mother answered,<br />“God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made..”<br /><br />Two days later the girl asked her father the same question..<br />The father answered,<br />“Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”<br /><br />The confused girl returned to her mother and said,<br />“Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?”<br /><br />The mother answered,<br />“Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his.”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3556915105031555154?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-45379731903022980462009-10-14T04:43:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:43:28.623-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an “I”.<br /><br />Student: I is the…<br /><br />Teacher: Stop! Never put ‘is’ after an “I”. Always put ‘am’ after an “I”.<br /><br />Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4537973190302298046?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-90080978180763294222009-10-14T04:42:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:43:00.457-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">One day Cheney, George Bush and Laura Bush were in a private jet going to France.<br /><br />Then, George Bush said, ” If i throw this hundred dollar bill off this jet I’ll make one person happy!”<br /><br />Then Cheney said, ” Man if i throw ten, ten dollar bills down, I’ll make ten people happy!”<br /><br />Then Laura Bush said, ” If I throw one hundred one dollar bills off this jet I’ll make a hundred people happy.”<br /><br />Then the pilot said, ” Man, if I throw these 3 losers outta this jet, I’ll make six billion people happy.”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-9008097818076329422?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-71684738832322417812009-10-14T04:42:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:42:32.750-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, “Pack up your things! I just won the lottery!”<br /><br />His wife replies, “Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?”<br /><br />The man responds, “I don’t care. Just so long as you’re out of the house by noon!”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7168473883232241781?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-75353824266555931852009-10-14T04:41:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:42:03.334-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">One day, Pete complained to his friend, “My elbow really hurts. I guessI should see a doctor.” His friend said, “Don’t do that. There’s a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine, and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00.<br /><br />Pete figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00.<br /><br />The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper which read:<br /><br />You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labor. It will be better in two weeks.<br /><br />That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this could be fooled.<br /><br />He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stoolsample from his dog, and urine samples from his wife and daughter.<br /><br />To top it off, he mastur… into the concoction.<br />He went back to the drug store, located the computer, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00.<br /><br />The machine again made the usual noises, flashed lights, and printed out the following analysis:<br /><br />Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.<br /><br />Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.<br /><br />Your daughter is using drugs. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.<br /><br />Your wife is pregnant . . . twin girls.<br />They aren’t yours.<br />Get a lawyer.<br /><br />And if you don’t stop ….. off, your elbow will never get better.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7535382426655593185?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-6929155199470861692009-10-14T04:41:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:41:33.817-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="color:#000066;">Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.</span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-692915519947086169?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-29823039476336101862009-10-14T04:40:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:41:11.234-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?”<br /><br />Father replied, “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2982303947633610186?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-2879514119645717372009-10-14T04:40:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:40:47.081-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, “Where’s Mom and dad?” and she replied, “they’re up in bed.”<br /><br />The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma “where’s Mom and Dad?” and she replied “they’re still up in bed.”<br /><br />Again the little boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the little boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma “where’s Mom and dad?” and his grandmother replied “they’re still up in bed.”<br /><br />The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, “what gives? Every time I tell you they’re still up in bed you start to laugh! what is going on here?” The little boy replied, “well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue.”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-287951411964571737?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-5771648985044468422009-10-14T04:39:00.000-07:002009-10-14T04:40:15.918-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A lady went to see a tarot reader woman who’ll predict her future:<br /><br />- Lady, I’m sorry to inform you that your husband will die in the near future.<br />- Don’t tell me things that I already know, tell me if there would be an investigation!!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-577164898504446842?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-8098665179170451542009-10-14T04:38:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:39:45.165-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:#000066;">Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-809866517917045154?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-77442322161254824842009-10-14T04:38:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:47:24.348-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A man who is driving a car is stopped by a police officer. The following exchange takes place…<br /><br />The man says “What’s the problem officer?”<br /><br />Officer: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.<br /><br />Man: No sir. I was going 65.<br /><br />Wife: Oh, Harry. Your were going 80. [Man gives his wife a dirty look.]<br /><br />Officer: I’m also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.<br /><br />Man: Broken tail light? I didn’t know about a broken tail Light!<br /><br />Wife: Oh, Harry, you’ve known about that tail light for weeks. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.)<br /><br />Officer: I’m also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.<br /><br />Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.<br /><br />Wife: Oh, Harry, you never wear your seat belt.<br /><br />Man turns to his wife and yells, “Shut your damn mouth!”<br /><br />Officer turns to the woman and asks, “Ma’am, does your husband talk to you this way all the time?”<br /><br />Wife: “No, only when he’s been drinking.”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7744232216125482484?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-25374863952437730732009-10-14T04:37:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:38:14.492-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:#000066;">How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2537486395243773073?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-72562866109016789972009-10-14T04:37:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:37:40.479-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses.<br />He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.<br />The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services.<br /><br />He gasps, “My friend is dead! What can I do?”.<br />The operator says “Calm down. I can help.<br />First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”<br /><br />There is a silence, then a shot is heard.<br />Back on the phone, the guy says “OK, now what?”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7256286610901678997?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-65847898666190734652009-10-14T04:36:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:37:11.309-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:#000066;">Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6584789866619073465?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-92066053791351086032009-10-14T04:36:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:36:41.388-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:#000066;">Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-9206605379135108603?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-28442868538616115132009-10-14T04:35:00.004-07:002009-10-14T04:36:17.245-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">There was this bar and in the bar there was a magic mirror.<br /><br />If you told a lie it would suck you in.<br /><br />One day a brunette walked into this bar. She walked up to the mirror and said ‘I think I’m the most beautiful woman in the world’ and it sucked her in.<br /><br />The next day a redhead walked into the bar. She walked up to the mirror and said ‘I think I’m the most beautiful woman in the world’ and it sucked her in.<br /><br />Then the next day a blond walked into the bar. She walked up to the mirror and said ‘I think…’ and it sucked her in.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2844286853861611513?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-32529951912443661292009-10-14T04:35:00.003-07:002009-10-14T04:35:43.418-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Heading off to college at the age of 40, I was a bit self-conscious about my advancing years.<br /><br />One morning I complained to my husband that I was the oldest student in my class. “Even the teacher is younger than I am,” I said.<br /><br />“Yeah,” he said optimistically, “but look at it from my point of view. I thought my days of fooling around with college girls were over!”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3252995191244366129?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-16112231889512625352009-10-14T04:35:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:35:16.915-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A young brunette goes into the doctor’s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.<br />“Impossible,” says the doctor. “Show me.”<br /><br />She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so on it goes.<br /><br />The doctor says, “You’re not really a brunette are you?”<br />She says, “No, I’m really a blonde.”<br /><br />“I thought so,” he says. “Your finger is broken.”</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1611223188951262535?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-51729518756980425952009-10-14T04:34:00.003-07:002009-10-14T04:34:49.734-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">When Chuck Norris does pushups, he doesn’t push himself up. He pushes the world down!<br /><br />Chuck Norris turns on a night light when he goes to bed. It’s not because he’s scared of the dark. It’s because the dark is scared of him!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-5172951875698042595?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-79869194923590148462009-10-14T04:34:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:34:19.599-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Knock knock.<br /><br />Whose there?<br /><br />Open the door and you’ll find out…</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7986919492359014846?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-54657226255471574662009-10-14T04:33:00.003-07:002009-10-14T04:33:55.389-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Q: Why did the man freeze his money?<br /><br />A: He wanted cold, hard cash!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-5465722625547157466?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-22570438588678503782009-10-14T04:33:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:33:30.324-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:#000066;">Each year on his wedding anniversary he goes down to City Hall. He will never give up the hope that his marriage license will someday expire…</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2257043858867850378?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-12782920354071687192009-10-14T04:32:00.003-07:002009-10-14T04:32:57.462-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A blonde rear ends a man. He gets out of his car and asks:<br /><br />- Have you ever even taken a driving test?<br /><br />- Yes, I have, and many times!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1278292035407168719?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-15155557052316311672009-10-14T04:32:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:32:30.885-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Husband: everytime I hit you, you never fight back. How do you manage your anger?<br /><br />Wife: I clean the toilet seat…<br /><br />Husband: How does it help?<br /><br />Wife: I use your toothbrush!</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1515555705231631167?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-32799501253936930572009-10-14T04:31:00.002-07:002009-10-14T04:32:00.436-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A beautiful woman entered a bar and sat next to a lawyer. “Listen honey,” she said, “For $50, I’ll do absolutely anything you want.”<br /><br />The lawyer pulled fifty dollars from his wallet and said, “Paint my house.”</span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3279950125393693057?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-60969169215707770252009-10-14T04:31:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:31:31.149-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Q: Why did the golfer wear tho pairs of pants?<br /><br />A: In case he got a hole in one.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6096916921570777025?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-46387657602985111252009-10-14T04:25:00.001-07:002009-10-14T04:31:02.670-07:00<span style="color:#000066;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">A student went to class late, so the teacher asked him, “Why are you late?”<br />He told her, “I was dreaming of a Manchester United football match.”<br /><br />But that did not make any sense for the teacher so she ask, “Still why are you late?”<br /><br />He answered, “Because there was extra time.”</span></span></span><br /><br /><div> </div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4638765760298511125?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-91084250587730697922009-10-13T04:38:00.001-07:002009-10-13T04:38:55.964-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Two elderly ladies were discussing the upcoming dance at the country club.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">“We’re supposed to wear something that matches our husband’s hair, so I’m wearing black,” said Mrs. Smith.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">“Oh my,” said Mrs. Jones, “I’d better not go!”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-9108425058773069792?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-71201936399884477092009-10-13T04:37:00.002-07:002009-10-13T04:38:16.310-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">A man goes hiking. He gets tired after a while and finds a cave to rest in he sees a shining light at the end of the tunnel its a magic lamp he rubs it and a genie pops out.</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">The genie says, “I will give you three wishes but there’s a catch, everything you wish for your wife gets double.”</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">So the man says okay.</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">First he wishes for a convertible, the genie says, “OK your wife gets double.”</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Then he wishes for a million dollars, the genie says, “OK your wife gets double.”</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Then his last wish is, “Beat me half to death!”</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7120193639988447709?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-13940687792664131662009-10-13T04:37:00.001-07:002009-10-13T04:37:41.592-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying “A dollar per point.”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The next class the professor handed the graded tests back out. This student got back his test, his test grade, and $64 change.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1394068779266413166?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-5061413296560827062009-10-13T04:35:00.000-07:002009-10-13T04:36:02.146-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">What has four legs and an arm?</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">A happy pit bull.</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-506141329656082706?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-49134207977317446312009-10-13T03:14:00.002-07:002009-10-13T03:15:23.507-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">A very attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender, who comes over immediately.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his full beard.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“Are you the manager?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“Actually, no” the man replies. “Can you get him for me?” she asks. “I need to speak to him,” she says, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“I’m afraid I can’t”, breathes the bartender. “Is there anything I can do?” “Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message” she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“What should I tell him?” the bartender manages to say.<br />“Tell him”, she whispers, “There is no toilet paper or hand soap in the ladies room.”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4913420797731744631?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-26909469268698719892009-10-13T03:14:00.001-07:002009-10-13T03:14:44.927-07:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb?<br /><br />Two. One always leaves in the middle of the project.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2690946926869871989?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-3456642076444659572009-10-13T03:13:00.001-07:002009-10-13T03:13:51.683-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Son: Is it true, Dad? I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Dad: That happens in most countries, son.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-345664207644465957?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-26615843129810759212009-10-13T03:12:00.001-07:002009-10-13T03:12:40.270-07:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Fact: Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris’ PC will crash.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2661584312981075921?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-33678640578735192652009-10-13T03:05:00.001-07:002009-10-13T03:07:00.443-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">At a convention of biological scientists one researcher remarks to another:</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">“Did you know that in our lab we have switched from mice to lawyers for our experiments?”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">“Really?” The other replied. “Why did you switch?”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">“Well, for two reasons.<br />First we found that lawyers are far more plentiful, and second, the lab assistants don’t get so attached to them!”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3367864057873519265?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-68692415865895617082009-10-13T02:52:00.000-07:002009-10-13T02:53:55.873-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">A successful woman is one who can find such a man.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6869241586589561708?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-83597148661567283362009-08-09T08:15:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:17:29.383-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Q: Why is Bill infuriated with Chelsea’s new private school?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">A: They broke family tradition by making her wear a uniform.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-8359714866156728336?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-38525112525349992342009-08-09T08:15:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:17:42.293-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Why did the idiot plant nickels in his garden?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">He wanted to raise some hard cash.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3852511252534999234?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-50523907903337783112009-08-09T08:14:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:19:17.344-07:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Patient: I’m really depressed.<br />Therapist: I see. Yes. You are depressed.<br />Patient: Nothing is going well.<br />Therapist: Nothing well.<br />Patient: I feel like killing myself.<br />T: You’re thinking of killing yourself.<br />P: Yes, I’m going to do it NOW.<br />T: You want to do it now.<br />P: [Jumps out window.]<br />T: Woosh. Splat.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-5052390790333778311?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-73157182467489814072009-08-09T08:14:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:18:57.709-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">There was this General-in-training, and his superioirs were asking him questions<br />“What happened on June 6, 1944?”<br />“We stormed the beach at Normandy, which later became known as D-Day, sir!”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">“What was the turining point of wordl war 2?”<br />“Battle of the bulge, sir!”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">“What’s is the importance of May 12″<br />The Man thought and thought “I don’t know, sir!”</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The superior then said<br />“Well, I’ll tell your wife that you forgot her birhtday”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7315718246748981407?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-44085806057622597542009-08-09T08:12:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:13:01.640-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">A man calls his family doctor.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Man: Doctor, for the last week my wife has thought that she was a rabbit.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Doctor: Ok, bring her in and I’ll try to help.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Man: Fine, but whatever you do, don’t cure her.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4408580605762259754?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-59342334988102512472009-08-09T08:12:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:12:33.283-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">What does Paul Inces mum make for Christmas?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Ince pies!</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-5934233498810251247?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-72760631563701794982009-08-09T08:11:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:12:08.343-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">How do you know if your little brother is turning into a fridge ?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">See if a little light come on whenever he opens his mouth !</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7276063156370179498?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-5825421698062462882009-08-09T08:11:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:11:41.671-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Why was Teddy Roosevelt mean to horses?</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">He was a rough rider!</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-582542169806246288?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-22481434182475663472009-08-09T08:10:00.004-07:002009-08-09T08:11:18.601-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup!</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Keep it down sir, or they’ll all be wanting one.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2248143418247566347?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-77960952941463519162009-08-09T08:10:00.003-07:002009-08-09T08:10:53.179-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane.</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons.<br />“Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?” she asked.</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">“No, thanks,” replied the vultures. “They’re carrion.”</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7796095294146351916?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-8606219032240091172009-08-09T08:10:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:10:25.625-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Jett was trying to light a match.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">He struck the first one and it didn’t work, so he threw it away.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">He struck the second match. That didn’t work either, so he tossed it.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Jett struck the third one and it lit up.<br />“That’s a good one!” said the idiot, blowing it out.<br />“Ah’m gonna save it!”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-860621903224009117?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-37002191937399814702009-08-09T08:09:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:09:59.823-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Policeman: I’ve had my eye on you for some time now.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Young Lady: That’s funny. I thought you were arresting me for speeding.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3700219193739981470?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-13202390017174826562009-08-09T08:08:00.000-07:002009-08-09T08:09:11.631-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">What kind of pig do sows dislike?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Male Chauvinist Pigs.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1320239001717482656?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-43973299131386425952009-08-09T08:07:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:08:32.418-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Casey married a rich widow, but they didn’t get along.<br />One day she said to him, “If it wasn’t for my money, that new television wouldn’t be here. If it wasn’t for my money, that grand piano wouldn’t be here. If it wasn’t for my money, this house wouldn’t be here.”</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Casey mumbled, “If it wasn’t for your money, I wouldn’t be here.”</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4397329913138642595?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-34655011577369349312009-08-09T08:07:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:07:33.071-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">How do you find your dog if he’s lost in the woods ?</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Put your ear up to a tree and listen for the bark !</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3465501157736934931?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-27410386131517479312009-08-09T08:06:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:07:05.716-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Q: How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb?</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">A: 1.99904274017, but that’s close enough for non-technical people</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2741038613151747931?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-48402132388643386452009-08-09T08:06:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:06:38.984-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">What’s the difference between an elephant and a piece of paper ?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">You can’t make a paper aeroplane out of an elephant!</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4840213238864338645?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-41591806374655601192009-08-09T08:05:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:06:11.758-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">And how did you find your steak sir?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Well, quite accidentally. I moved this tomato slice and there it was!</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4159180637465560119?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-25485935513218321372009-08-09T08:05:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:05:37.495-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Which author do the Gorillas love most?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Joh Steinbeck - who wrote ‘The Apes of Wrath!’</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2548593551321832137?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-36351990203325038672009-08-09T08:04:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:05:05.672-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Policeman: Why didn’t you check your speedometer?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Driver: It broke when I hit 100.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3635199020332503867?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-66865029595664673842009-08-09T08:04:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:04:35.364-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">What do you call a girl with a frog in her hair ?</span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Lily !</span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6686502959566467384?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-39194534329352384542009-08-09T08:03:00.000-07:002009-08-09T08:04:03.907-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">What is as big as King Kong but doesn’t weigh anything?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">King Kong’s shadow.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3919453432935238454?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-51465922110371582882009-08-09T08:02:00.002-07:002009-08-09T08:03:15.040-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">One day, a blonde’s neighbor goes over to her house, sees the blonde crying, and asks her what happened. The blonde said that her mother had passed away. The neighbor made her some coffee and calmed her down a little and then left.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The next day the neighbor went back over to the house and found the blonde crying again. She asked her why she was crying this time.</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I just got off of the phone with my sister, her mother died too!”</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-5146592211037158288?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-80951173198075583792009-08-09T08:02:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:02:29.555-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Q: What kind of work does a weak cat do?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">A: Light mouse work.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-8095117319807558379?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-65220380610644479072009-08-09T08:01:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:01:53.562-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Teacher: What can you tell me about the Dead Sea?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;">Pupil: Dead?, I didn’t even know he was sick!</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6522038061064447907?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-48227461219930428052009-08-09T08:00:00.001-07:002009-08-09T08:00:33.362-07:00<p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Q:What did one eye say to the other eye?</span></span></span></p> <p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000066;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">A:Between you and me something smells.</span></span></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4822746121993042805?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-88671502594637886992009-08-07T11:06:00.000-07:002009-08-07T11:08:01.145-07:00<p align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Father: Dear son This time you have to gain at least 95% marks..</span></p><p align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Son: No dad , I will gain 100% this time..</span></p><p align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Father: why are you making a joke..</span></p><p align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Son: Who started first …..?????</span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-8867150259463788699?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-47954283257352901072009-08-07T11:05:00.000-07:002009-08-07T11:06:31.833-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.”Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4795428325735290107?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-35556529614860662542009-08-07T11:04:00.000-07:002009-08-07T11:05:38.409-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Why is 6 afraid of 7?</span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">-because 7 ate 9!!!!</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3555652961486066254?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-88582238253105879902009-08-07T11:02:00.000-07:002009-08-07T11:04:15.090-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Sonu: How many chickens in your bag?<br />Monu: If you will guess, I will give you both.<br />Sonu: I think it’s 4.</span> <p> </p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-8858223825310587990?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-43164999970583705642009-08-07T11:01:00.000-07:002009-08-07T11:02:26.665-07:00<div align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.<br />They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason!</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-4316499997058370564?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-14436877425987684982009-08-07T10:59:00.000-07:002009-08-07T11:00:40.701-07:00<div align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">“Hi, this is Steve.<br />There’s nobody here, and even if there was we wouldn’t answer the phone.<br />And even if we did, we wouldn’t say anything.<br />Maybe you shouldn’t have called.”</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-1443687742598768498?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-78744938780043422382009-07-28T11:16:00.001-07:002009-07-28T11:16:55.161-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Women might be able to fake org*sms. But men can fake a whole relationship!</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-7874493878004342238?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-66106065274569876992009-07-28T11:15:00.001-07:002009-07-28T11:15:29.725-07:00<div align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Q: Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6610606527456987699?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-22525022116561610812009-07-27T07:45:00.002-07:002009-07-27T07:46:12.961-07:00<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Teacher: You seem very well read, have you read Shakespeare ?<br />Pupil: No<br />Teacher: What have you read then?<br />Pupil: Umm, I’ve got red hair !</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-2252502211656161081?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-37630682096527905622009-07-27T07:45:00.001-07:002009-07-27T07:45:38.178-07:00<div align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">I’m learning ancient history ?<br />So am I, lets go for a walk and talk over old times !</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-3763068209652790562?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-62190698082361282042009-07-27T07:43:00.001-07:002009-07-27T07:43:55.929-07:00<div align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">What did God say after she made Eve?<br />“Practice makes perfect.”</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6219069808236128204?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-62600197572873324752009-07-27T07:42:00.002-07:002009-07-27T07:43:13.250-07:00<div align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">Doctor, doctor, I feel like I’m part of the Internet!<br />Well, you do look a site.</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-6260019757287332475?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2123937723440895593.post-88502931139229849482009-07-27T07:42:00.001-07:002009-07-27T07:42:35.216-07:00<div align="left"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;color:#000066;">How can you double your money?<br />Look at it in a mirror.</span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2123937723440895593-8850293113922984948?l=short-funny-jokes4u.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>O Bla Blahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03637975555361793709noreply@blogger.com0